Thursday, April 29, 2004

Once more into the breech... It's time to go back to .ru. I can assure you that the blogs will be of higher quality once I reach the office. Stay tuned.

Sunday, April 25, 2004

The other day I took the bottles back. I have always had mixed feelings about this chore. On one hand it's totally gross, on the other it's like being visited by the ghost of parties past.

Friday, April 23, 2004

The rain barrel is back for another year of competition, but this time around, it will be of more use because it now has ball-valve action. With this latest scratch off the honeydew list, the backyard is beginning to resemble suburbia instead of 'behind the shop.' There is still a way to go but every step brings us closer to shangri-la (once achieved, we will no doubt decide to sell.)

Tuesday, April 20, 2004

When an Xbox is saving the progress of your game, a message appears on the screen that says "Saving, Please do not turn off your Xbox console." This never used to be a problem when the console was across the room, but now that it's at arm's length, whenever I see this, I take a sidelong glance at the power switch. How very strange.

Sunday, April 18, 2004

As a self-qualified expert on console rally racing games (I've played and won most of them), my endorsment for best franchise goes to Colin Mcrae Rally. Now in it's fourth and perhap's final iteration, Mcrae continues to lead the field in awesomeimnity. Although the graphics and audio have always been top-notch, the quality that has kept Mcrae at the top of my list is the pacenote integration. The newest version nearly defies description. I have seen my (and probably most of western canada's) share of real-life in-car footage and Mcrae 04 delivers. In the words of my brother, it's "stupid-wicked man." 'Nuff said.

www.laceratedgibbon.com

Saturday, April 17, 2004

The scoring results for the 2004 sister competition are in early this year. The winner: Katrina. The clinching move was getting me a signed first edition print of Neal Stephenson's latest book. Sorry to all the other competitors, though I have started the judging for next year's competition.

Wednesday, April 14, 2004

Here's my latest problem: Should I set my watches to the atomic clock in boulder colorado via the internet or to the time recieved on my gps reciever from the gps network? That's a tough one I know...

What better way to celebrate moving 114 barrow-fulls of dirt than with this week's haiku?

Fresh dirt and cold beer,
they are always together;
they shall never meet.

Tuesday, April 13, 2004

Why do people speed up when there is a passing lane and slow down when there isn't? I think it must be linked to the human need to congregate to chat in stairwells, doorways, and other generally narrow places.

Wednesday, April 07, 2004

Alas, it is once again time to rekindle the seedy romance with a game called golf. I have an ace up my sleeve this year though, I've been playing Tiger Woods 2004 all winter...

Tuesday, April 06, 2004

When I was growing up I used to look at cars with dog snot all over the inside windows, and I used to think "That'll never be me." Guess what, I hate the fact that I now have a dog-car. Oh well, it can't last forever can it?

Wow, I mean wow. I see that the tireless minds at Shick have finally perfected the four blade razor. This has to be a huge moral booster for them after losing ground in the three blade wars when Gillette announced both red and blue versions of their popular Mach 3. A Gillette spokesman said "While we realize the R&D spent on painting the Mach 3 has put us a little behind in the launch of our four-blade < aka Pheonix>, we have projected that the money spent will enable us to bring more advanced four-blades to the public sooner." When asked if they were going to piant them too, he ended the press conference. The Shick rep responded to the question of painted razors with "We could use someone like you. What color do you think is shavey?"

Saturday, April 03, 2004

I think it may be time to replace the old P200MMX. I bought it in '97 I think for $5000. It was the hottest thing going, 3gig HD, cdrom, 32megs of ram, 15" (13.9" vis) crt flatscreen. I had it all I tells ya. Now, it can hardly walk and chew gum. Oh well, all good things, bla bla bla. Hmm, but what to replace it with? A mac? Perhaps.

Friday, April 02, 2004

Let me complain about hardware for a moment (the non-electronic stuff.) I realize that a large portion of production costs can be trimmed by including the bare minimum grade of screws, nuts, nails, etc. But come on people, I have twisted screws in half with only a screwdriver in pre-drilled holes, pre-drilled! And that was while gingerly trying not to strip the malformed head, which doesn't really fit any screwdriver known to exist in this sector of the galaxy. And the last time I had something in which nails were involved, I think I would have had better success cutting inch long pieces of dental floss and using that. It's time to make a stand people. I am tired of being pushed around. I am tired of being forced to rummage around in the garage for the same size screw halfway through an assembly project so some fat-cat Swede can get extra pax on his giffelsluug. So, with that intro, the domain name of the week is...

www.bettersrcews.com

Sounds unmistakable, no?

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